Kiss my Asphalt

We got a notice on the door the other day explaining about the resurfacing of the parking lot in our apartment complex. The notice went on to explain that any vehicles not moved when the contractors arrived would be towed, impounded, hijacked, joyridden, graffitied, indicted, shot, re-shot, lit, re-lit, shot, hung, drawn, quartered, eighthed, framed, assassinated, painted, trashed, burned, crashed, folded, spindled, and mutilated, all at the owners' expense.

In reality, they just drape a car cover over you and go around. The semi-absurd image of a lone car in a sea of fresh black surface struck me as worth sharing.